Home is the sweetest place on earth. As soon as I walked off my plane in Baltimore a week ago, I felt the sweetness in the chilly fall air and damp from a recent rain. I-97 was wide open in the early morning, and even though it was 9:00 by the time mom and I reached the Chesapeake Bay Bridge, I have never felt like we had so much room on the road! And oh, that Chesapeake Bay! The water was as choppy as a stormy sea and the sky dark from rain clouds. Rather than a dreary grey, the sky was a deep, dark blue that highlighted the rich colors of the recently-rained on land, land that soaked up the water like a sponge and bloomed like a flower after a long, dry summer. The sight of that bay catches my breath every single time I see it after a long hiatus from home, and as soon as I am over the bridge, I am home on Delmarva again!
Life has slowed down significantly in pace, something I am very thankful for. To have my own room and a quiet house when I am alone is a blessing. That's not to say I haven't had plenty of things to do. In fact, I started working part-time at a daycare just two days after arriving home, with multiple other offers for side jobs. After struggling for a month to find adequate work, it is a relief to know there are plenty of opportunities for me to make enough to pay my bills. The thing to watch now is guarding my time so that I don't try to do too much. (I am thankful that I have a very concerned mother who knows my weaknesses and pushes me to keep focused in this way!)
I need tasks to keep me fulfilled, and being a bit ADD, as well, I have a hard time staying focused on one thing. But that can turn into overworking and over-committing myself, and everyone giving me any type of advice about missions advises on the importance of nurturing my relationship with Christ during this time. I essentially have a year to really, really delve deep into Him to prepare my heart for giving myself like I've never given before. To guard that time when I can study His love letter to humanity, to learn His voice better, to ingrain His promises into my mind and heart. The danger of complacency is one to ward off, especially during the adjustment period. The other night I began to feel incredibly discouraged for no reason other than feeling tired, alone, and restless, but I asked a friend to pray for the battle going on in me as I took a walk down the road. No traffic and soybean fields on either side provided the perfect backdrop to my restlessness as I walked and talked out how I felt to the Lord. When I returned to my house I opened my Bible, and it came alive! I started out in Philippians and then got into the missionary journeys of Paul in Acts... the miracles and the way the Holy Spirit led him are so exciting because the work he began in spreading the gospel to the Gentiles has been going on ever since then! Jesus wants to bring people from everywhere into His kingdom, and that's why He is waiting to return. He is waiting for us to work with the Holy Spirit in making disciples of all nations. This is the reminder I need when I feel like moping around (and I admit that I feel like moping often.) Pray that I do what I should to guard my relationship with Christ and keep His call burning in me.
This is all I have for now! Since I have to be at work in eight hours, it is high time I "hit the hay" as my mom would say. I'm not sure what it means to "hit the hay" - it must be some weird farm reference. She has all kinds of hilarious sayings that make no sense until you know her or the context. I have always said that someday I will put her sayings in a book, but I am terrible at keeping track of them!
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