Walk on Water

The Delmarva Peninsula is taking every precaution against Hurricane Sandy. But admittedly, when my pastor had the congregation pray against the storm this morning in church, I wasn't exactly agreeing in faith because I want the storm to come! There is something about hearing that rain beat against the roof and watching through the window as leaves and debris swirl around that excites me. It's almost 10 pm, and there's not a bit of wind yet. Grrr. Bring on some action!

I made it home from Indianapolis just in time for the storm. Last week was spent at the Global Partners (GP) headquarters, learning all about being a missionary with GP. My head was crammed full of information and strategies and names and all the stuff I have to do! But what an incredibly encouraging time it was to hang out with some other people who are doing the same thing and learn together. I had to face some fears, and this next year is going to be a mountain of them. It's much like knowing there's a storm brewing, and I have to face it. But will I prepare myself? I wish I could face the metaphorical storm with as much drive and motivation as I face a hurricane headed toward Delaware.


While I have a ton of excitement and passion about my ministry, I also have a crazy amount of fear, which puts my focus on others' expectations and opinions of me, or my personal qualities or abilities, or lack thereof...

I think of Peter out on the water in a wind storm. When he saw Jesus he said,

"Lord, if it's you tell me to come to you on the water."

What was Peter thinking?!? If you look just a few verses before this in Matthew 14, you realize the disciples were afraid the person they were seeing walking on water was a ghost. If I were in the middle of a huge body of water on a tiny boat, the thought of getting out of the boat and walking on something not really created to be walked on toward someone who might not even really be there would never enter my mind. Let me stay where I can touch something solid, thank you very much, and watch someone else do the crazy stuff.

Maybe Peter was being a showoff. Or impulsive. Or maybe he wanted to try to prove himself. I'm speculating here. Whatever he was thinking, he made a pretty dangerous declaration:

"Tell me to come to you."

I wonder if he really thought Jesus would tell him to step out of the boat. I wonder what he was thinking as he made that first step over the side. It was literally a step of faith! If the other disciples still thought Jesus was a ghost, they probably tried to convince Peter not to do it.

But he put his leg over... and then the other... and he didn't sink. He actually walked on the water. He was so excited and headed toward Jesus. But then his view of the wind and water crowded out his sight of Jesus. He started to sink and yelled out to Jesus for help.

And of course, Jesus caught him.

Have you ever asked Jesus to do something that seemed impossible? I have. Sometimes I got so freaked out that I couldn't get out of the boat. But Jesus was right there, ready to catch me. He is like the father in the swimming pool, ready to catch his little daughter when she jumps in his arms. It is a feeling I know I will face often in the future. Please pray that I won't let the wind and waves of fear keep me from obeying his voice and stepping into the unknown.